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Hitting Bottom (A semi​-​conscious look into what in the fuck actually happened in 2012)

by Autumn Arrested

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1.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTV0KCodJt8&feature=relmfu (skip to 7:13)
2.
Part 1 02:53
3.
Part 2 03:26
4.
it's been a while since they've called my name. i found self-confidence in bags of cocaine. and i'm at that age where it all goes to waste, and it all goes down the same. yeah, it's a shame. it'll be one year monday; four kids, one parkway. it's been one year since i've prayed and i'm pretty fucking sure nothing's even changed. yeah, it's a goddamn shame. i'm such a waste. i'm such a fucking waste. it'll be one year monday.
5.
and to think i would have let you in with open arms. thinking 3rd time's a charm. only to be let down again. i'm let down again. i gave you the benefit of the doubt more than my friends did. but i didn't benefit. only to be sleeping alone again. i'm sleeping alone again. the nights where you couldn't breathe, and the nights that i couldn't sleep... they didn't mean anything. i said i love you and i'd never leave. babydoll, i'm so sorry. i said i'd never leave. i sat by the phone for an hour to see if you made it. you didn't make it. and to think i would have let you in with open arms. i sat by the phone for an hour to see if you made it. you didn't. the nights where you couldn't breathe, and the nights that i couldn't sleep... they didn't mean anything. i said i love you and i'd never leave. babydoll, can't you see? i'm not entirely sorry. i'm let down again.
6.
Plano, TX 05:26
3am, sharing cigarettes with the spider crickets and dive-bombing beetles, while you're busy sharing needles. walking into webs as the phone rings again. it's Plano, TX, and the secret sex lives of all my friends. he said/she said we manipulated, but we never got our stories straightened. yeah, anxiety's a bitch, but no one seems to want to listen. walking into webs as the phone rings again. it's Plano, TX, and the secret sex lives of all my friends. yeah, he said/she said, Plano, TX, and prescription medicine. the phone rings again. don't answer it. there was one time i thought i'd be fine. turns out, i'm a shitty fucking liar. if i had something worth saying, i'd pick a number and get in line. there was one time i thought i'd be fine. turns out, i'm a shitty fucking liar. the phone rings one more time.
7.
if you don't want them, let me lift the burden from your hands, from hearts, to shoulders. we can only carry so much weight. we can only pretend to dance the night away. but we know they're only placeholders. i'd like to think there's something bigger, blur it all together and ignore what our mothers told us. O please Lord, deliver me from the evil in everything. draw progress from my apathy. keep it from dying within me.
8.
meet me there in the blue. where words are not. feeling remains. sincerity. trust in me. throw myself into your door. and i go in circles. running down, in circles. i'm running down. meet me there in the blue. where words are not. feeling remains. and i dream to heal your wounds, but i still bleed myself. i bleed myself. and i go in circles. running down in circles. i'm running down.

about

2012 was weird.

credits

released August 30, 2012

robert downey jr, my friends, failed sexual interests, my parents separating, meds working/not working/drinking while taking medications/working/not working/so on and so forth, sleeping too much or not sleeping at all, not going to school, working at a methadone clinic, getting fired from that clinic because I was underhandedly accused of stealing $800, car payments, not paying car payments, etc.

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all rights reserved

tags

about

Autumn Arrested Atlantic City, New Jersey

I'm Max. This is the page for my solo thing, Autumn Arrested. All instruments and vocals done by me. I need band members. Other than that, uh, yeah. Enjoy my shit.

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